Tuesday, 6 December 2011

Bad Birthday!

Must say, it was indeed worst year of life, Yeah 2011 you were too bad for me in many ways but never mind if it gonna ends well J. There comes many moments when things made me to say--- I wanna go where nobody knows my name, when my own was falling apart.

I admit, I had some very bad habits and finally, finally I have taken the decision to get rid of them. This birthday took away promise from me to say NO to shit things and really looking forward to have very positive change J J yes I can do it ;)

I ‘m just thinking I have wasted hell of time in finding happiness in wrong people at wrong places. How funny, people who started walking by holding my hand, who were nothing before they happened to me, I gave them love, time, smiles, pride and status and now they have turned their faces back and …. They hardly know my existence J How mean! Sometime I feel like taking them to top of the mountain and kick their ***: P but never mind again lesson learnt not to land your hand to selfish and mean world! They will use you hard and left their shit in return.

Nevertheless, it does not matter, when god makes you come across such people, when god put you under strict circumstances, HE also has so much to give you. The love I have is a countless blessing; the love I do not deserve is all around me J it is this love that I am able to make through… Thanks god, for giving few very solid reason to go on. “My family and my love”

One another year of life passed away and sadly, which was not a good oneL just desperately needed good year ahead, December, it was first time that I am not happy on my birthday and have started waiting for the next one….

hopes_______ dreams_______ faith_______!!

Wednesday, 21 September 2011

takin' back

in a situation where
something that meant for you legally, socially, emotionally but
they want every bit of it to break- break it up- tore it apart!

If i'll step forward i'll see the darkness on the faces that I always cherished
and whom I lived up for so long... their smiles are my life!
If i'll step back i'll cover up my identity with blanket of misery
from the world outside and the world inside
I'll be thrown to the world where there is no light, no air and no space
Me, myself, my existance,
My all happiness would be taken back
the pain i went through 7 years would end up in darkness again
i won't be able to say, YES my patience lived well, I am rewarded

but what do i do, stepping forward will kill me to death and pushing myself back is hell
I prayed, prayed and prayed to GOD,
i begged and begged and i know this was meant to be broken....
WHY GOD, why i was given in first place when it was not meant for me?

 I am pleeding GOD, don't take it away
it's my food, my breath to survive,
my soul to comfort my dead flash
i hv empty handed with injured dead body, bleeding all complete and through!
Just don't take it back!
It was mine and you gave it to me..... You gave it to me in front of hundred thousand ppl,
I can't back off... I can't be empty handed

Thursday, 25 August 2011

There is no end to it...

Yeah, another sleepless night!
When you tried to prove every bit of me "Evil"

degraded, disrespected!
cursed & abused...

they say, you get what you well deserve

Yeah, you're right in every aspect
You did well in tearing apart my "Soul"